Shame based thinking is accusation driven and performance based living.
You should. You could. You better. You ought to. You must.
1. Shame pins you down.
2. It holds you back.
3. You spin in one spot.
4. And ruminate over and over and over.
5. And yet to never please and you are unable to move forward.
I was on the phone with a woman. It was a sad story of someone she loved being deceived. Yet, she was beating herself up with these questions.
How come I did not see it?
I was deceived, again.
What will people say?
What will they think?
Around and around her thoughts ruminated and spun and shrunk her down.
You should have seen it. You could have caught it.
She even distanced herself from the people she was fearful of.
SHAME does that! Attacks you inward and hounds you and chases you around inside.
It is you. It is your fault. You are a loser. You could have done better.
Within ten minutes I drove the questions she needed to have answers to.
She heard where she was STUCK.
She changed the direction of her thoughts!
She thanked me at least three times.
But, what stood out to me was this, “Now, I can sleep tonight and most likely my first good night sleep in 8 months.”
SHAME robs us of joy, peace, truth and focus and forward steps.
Shame is not of God.
Are you stuck in SHAME based thinking, the should of, the ought to, the better, or have to? And you go around and around and you beat yourself up with shame based thinking?
Start NOW to change your thoughts and words...let’s chat, so you can learn how coaching can change up your thought life from bondage and pain to freedom and peace so you can learn to live freedoms way, and sleep well!
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